Thursday, August 30, 2012

Cosmopoils: Movie Review


Cast: Robert Pattinison, Juliette Binoche

Writer and Director: David Cronenberg

1/2 * out of four

I, for one, love David Cronenberg.  He is one of the most creative and visually interesting directors of all time.  A majority of his films, including "The Fly", "Videodrome" and "A History of Violence", are consider to be great classics.  I even liked the ones that didn't get such high praise, such as "eXistenZ", "Crash" and " A Dangerous Method".  There has never been a movie of his I actually loathed and hated, until now.  It is a great shame, because his latest effort looked like it was going to be a really odd, but really exciting, tale featuring odd images, heavy sex, and crazy violence.  Man, was I ever wrong.  This is one of the slowest and dullest flicks I have ever seen.

After sitting through this entire movie, I still could not come up with a single way to describe what it's about.  I had to get a lot of this description from IMDB and Wikipedia.  Eric Packer (Robert Pattinson) is a millionaire who travels in his very plush limo to get a haircut across town.  Along the way, he meets various people and has conversations that I never could follow, and has sex with random women.  He also meets up with protesters who throw rats at people, he loses money, and ends up discovering that someone wants to kill him.

Every single character in this flick speaks like a damn robot.  They are devoid of any type of emotion and that made it extremely difficult to empathize with anyone.  In "Crash" they do the same thing, but I can forgive it, because in that one they all are empty shells who only start to feel alive when they fulfill their sexual desires by causing car accidents.  "Cosmopolis" has no scenes of passion or excitement, at all.  If you are going to do a flick about a guy who discovers that he is going to lose all his money or be assassinated, make him more interesting so that I care if he lives or dies.  Also, explain the world outside of the limo.  Why is there a protest going on?  Is it just another Occupy Wall Street movement, or is there something more that could be explained?

I feel kind of bad for Robert Pattinson, because this was going to be the movie that broke him out of the whole "Twilight " franchise and showed people that he can take on meatier roles.   He does fine for what he has been given, but unfortunately, it's not that much.  The movie has a great list of actors including Paul Giamatti, and Samantha Morton, but they are just given lines to recite, instead of fully fleshed-out real people.  I swear, the dialouge in this is like having someone read a phone book to you for over two hours.

The only positive things I can say about this movie was that it had interesting visuals and the score by Howard Shore was amazing.  Long before he composed the score to the "Lord Of The Rings" saga, he had been composing a lot of movies for Mr. Cronenberg, and this one is really good.  The song used in the end credits, that features indie band Metric, made me want to buy this soundtrack.  If those are the only positive things to say about this flick, that's not a good reason to see it.  Then again, I could be wrong.  Maybe this movie is so far ahead of its time that I need to revisit it at a later point in my life.  I did not like "Blade Runner" or "Big Liebowski" when I first watched them, and now I consider them to be the greatest movies ever made.  Time has a way of changing opinions on a flick, but as for right now, I'm giving this one a skip.

(Song used at the end credits and the only thing I liked about the entire movie)


  1. Woah this is yet another review that makes it look bad. I guess instead of going to see it I'll just buy the soundtrack, I love Shore's music for Existenz.

    1. I thought it was really good. With regards to the lack of emotion I think that shows how the characters are numb to the outside world and shows their detatchment from it. The fact that the anarchy wasn't explained leaves it up to our imagination. Does it have something to do with Pattinson's character? Is it a critique of the modern world? I think the final scenes helps answer that and also allows some emotion to creep into the performances.

    2. Sati. Im checking out a few tracks from eXistenZ and it's impressive. Howard Shore's score can compliment any movie and make it that much better.

      Tom. It's fine if the characters are numb to the outside world or that the anarchy is not explained, but why should I as an audience member be excited to go on this journey. I will in a few years see it again, and my opinion may very well change.

    3. It's one of those films that really divides people. I think I gave it around 7-8/10 but have seen five star and one star reviews.